Taking a Break

I spent the last 10 days avoiding most of my regular activities -- aside from seeing people. I stayed away from blogging, sitting on the computer, playing on my phone or Ipad. Just need some me time. Well...I started the month off strong. Doing most of my activities solo or without a regard towards my ex.

EASTER WEEKEND
I weighed myself Easter weekend. I had lost 15 pounds. It was great to see that number on the scale but I knew how I got there. I could not bring myself to eat...unless I was around my ex. The first weekend we broke it off - he gave me a 1/4 of his burrito - I finished it. The following week - we went to Coconut Joes - I ate a good portion of our sampler.

I took into a relaxation method I havent done in awhile - I figured maybe relaxation would make me want to eat...slightly correct. Unforunately - it was only binging and it wasnt the right foods.

I finally got myself to hit the gym Friday [Good Friday]. I figured Id be weak and unable to real workout. A co-worker of mine said to take it slow and not overdue it. I got on the treadmill first, which I never do. I took that speed way up and it wasnt enough. I ran straight through, which is not normal for me right now. Feeling my feet slam against the treadmill tread was fantastic. I blared the music in my ears as loud as possible, stared myself right in the eyes and just kept running. I felt myself getting winded, I felt my breath getting short and I felt the sweat. Didnt bother me for once, I kept going. I needed this. I needed this release.

The release came. All of a sudden, my lips went pale, my energy scooted down. I stopped the treadmill completely, but then realized, I needed to keep a brisk walk pace so I dont pass out. I was wiped out. Not from the actual run but the amount of emotions that came up to the surface. Suddenly I was sad/angry/heartbroken. All the feelings I tried to bury, came right on up. I took a walk to the bathroom incase I was going to get sick...then hopped on the bike - went my normal speed and it didnt feel like enough, so I pushed it up. Then I went for weights/abs/arms...couldnt seem to stop. Finally, I looked at myself in the mirror and decided I needed to take it easy.

--

As of this morning - I know I want my rockin' body back but I want to do it by eating right again, and running. I leave to Egypt on Thursday of this current week. So, Ive got a little bit of time to get some work outs in and enjoy myself. Ive slid in sips of alcohol and unhealthy food.

MY OOPS FOODS DURING HEARTBREAK:

• Chipotle Burrito [1/4 of it]
• Sips of Izze
• Crab Dip [3x]
• 3 Coconut Shrimp
• Cup of Rasberry Tea
• 1/4 of a Ginger Ale
• 2 Bottles of Apple Juice
• Monte Cristo Sandwich
• 4 Bagels
• Cream Cheese on each of those bagels
• 1/4 Mousse Cake
• 1/4 Strawberry Shortcake
• SBShortcake Shooter
• Mimosa
• GROSS chinese food
• half a package of ritz crackers

I think thats it for "bad".

HERE'S TO NEW CHOICES...and BETTER DECISIONS!